Kia.

"Follow me. It's right here. I swear it's right here".

Max followed the voice. The road was getting harder and harder to walk on. The grasses were getting taller. The ground were more and more uneven.

"But...hey, I can't. It's getting too dangerous for me. Hey!"

Then the world just turned black.

Slowly, Max opened his eyelids. His visions were blurred.

"Max? Max?"

He heard a voice calling out his name.

"That voice, where did I heard it before?" he thought.

"Oh God, Max, please answer me. Please."

A few droplets of water fell on his cheeks and trickled to his lips. Salty. Tears. Why is this person crying? What's going on? Where am I?

"...."

I'm fine, where am I? Max tried to speak but could not. Panic, started to build inside of him.

"Max, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry that it has to turn out this way..."

What is wrong with you, woman?! My eyes are open, aren't they? Who the hell are you? What are you talking about. Oh my God, call the doctor! Help! I'm alive! Help! Max tried with all his might.

"...I really did not mean for this to happen. Why, Max? Oh God, Max. I love you..."

The machine beeps angrily. The man on the bed was breathing furiously. His eyelids flew open. (Or were they open the whole time?) The crying woman was so surprised. Relief washed over her and as soon as that happens, a mixture of guilt and sympathy replaces it.

Max stared at her, hard. He opened his mouth to say something.

"I love, you, Kia", he croaked.

"...but that is all."

And then she left.

It was not fair how she left. How she also left a mountain of questions, hanging in the air, when she carries her body, and every memories, out of the door.

"I told you it was here." said the voice.

And the ring of the alarm clock drowns the voice and Max's breaking heart.

Fin

So maybe, in the end, it's not a happy ending. But must it be a sad ending?

Why must it end?

Let's just continue the journey.

Dark

In this darkness
I seek
a beacon
that shall be my guide
to drive me away
and save me
from its greed.

The flame of confusion
is always lit
and yet it brings no difference
to one's vision
only one's feelings.

I stumble upon this darkness
and kept stumbling since.
And I just wonder
did I stumble upon,
or was I stumbling all along.


2238 hour (19/01/10)

The difference.

I remember the days, when things were sweet and unpredictable.

Nowadays, things are twisted and unpredictable.

In time

I watch you go, further and further.

As we slowly drift apart.

Daily basis

Yes, yes, I told you, I've checked it a million times. There's no new text from you.

No. No. It's okay.

I understand.

Mistake #(infinity)

I have been warned
but I paid no attention.
And again I face the consequences
of making this mistake
which is agreed by many, a mistake
which I took the chance to make
in hopes that the mistake
only mistaken as a mistake.

Look at how far we've gone
you are blind, boy.
And I,
blinded by you.

Closed my eyes to your imperfections.
You are perfect despite your imperfections.
Perfect, to me.
Perfect, for me.
But I know.
I am not, to you.
For you

I held on, so long,
too long.
Holding on for the sake of holding on.
That is where I am wrong.
Or was that the reason why?

This is not a promise,
that I can move on
or will move on.
Nor is it an announcement,
of me moving on.

This is just,
me,
being me.


2244 hour (02/01/10)

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