Painted memories

Every time I close my eyes
I wonder
to where will my thoughts be adrift.
I was afraid that it will drift to a memory
I no longer wish to keep.
It has been awhile
and I felt my wounds starting to heal
and only left me with scars
that remind me
where I have been.

You were the wound that bled me
'till I'm all dried up.
You were the wound that cut me
in so deep.

But I was healing
and you, remain a scar.
But a scar hurts more than a wound
sometimes.


2317 hour (16/10/10)

The Queen

I try with my hands and my knees
my brain pitching in.
With my eyes and my ears on guard
so my mouth'll be in control.

But my heart could never reach your heart.
Have you seen my soaked pillows?
the tears I shook away.
Have you heard of my pain?
the screams in my head.
Have you ever notice my happiness?
the shape of my broken smiles.

Was I ever good enough for you?


2106 hour (16/10/10)

M

You have shown me your tears
You have told me of the trophies you deserve
You have reasoned and justified
and yes, I have seen them
and yes, I understand
and yes, I know.

You throw your tantrums
You shout your silences
You burnt me with your stares
and you made you the centre of my life.

You want to be pleased
You want to be satisfied
but you are never
you are never.

Will you learn to be happy?
Will you learn to be thankful?
Age is creeping on you
and I'm sorry I can never do you justice
but I have tried.
I have tried.


2043 hour (16/10/10)

Be my Sun
be my moon
I'll be your cloud
I'll be your star
I'll be with you
eternally.


Note : something I wrote last year, I think.

The Universe

Like the end of a downpour
the pitter-patter of the raindrops,
stopping.
Like the smell of freshly mowed grass,
fading.
I loved you.

Like how the Sun shows its affection to Earth
hugging it with its light
by day
and reminds Earth that it loves it still
through the Moon reflecting its light
by night
and hence,
it loves it always.
I have loved you with all my might.

But even the Sun will eventually come to its end.
I have loved you.


2226 hour (09/10/10)


Note : and life goes on.

Shadow

I am going to hide behind the shadows of gone,
even when I am here.
Because there is no point in reminding,
there is no point in stepping out of the shadow
because I am just a shadow.

A shadow.

You see and you forget.
You know it is there and you don't care
A shadow overshadowed by another
Another is important,
but, not I,
the shadow.

Just a shadow,
a shadow.
And what would you feel if you were just a shadow?
I know for I,
am just a shadow
for they,
who do not care.

But alas,
they are just a shadow
to a shadow.


1601 (2/10/10)


Note: .